


I Hate Hanging

by JarOfJelli



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Chloe is a bitch, I feel like male rape is taken too lightly in fiction, I love her but right here she's a bitch, I'm bad at writing, Jeremy's POV, Let's be clear everything that happened during Do You Wanna Hang was rape, This song makes me genuinely mad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-17
Updated: 2018-04-17
Packaged: 2019-04-23 23:58:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,444
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14343681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JarOfJelli/pseuds/JarOfJelli
Summary: What realistically was going on in Jeremy's head during "Do You Wanna Hang?"





	I Hate Hanging

Chloe drags me upstairs. She grabbed a hold of my hand seconds ago, telling me something about talking to Brooke, and pulls me towards the door at the end of the upstairs hallway.

Chloe looks at me and smirks, her hand still holding mine. "Jake's parents' room" she explains, turning the doorknob, "don't worry" she pushes the door open with her free hand, "they're not using it". We both step inside.

I hope that this isn't going to lead to where my mind is going.

My hope diminishes slightly at the sight of her locking the door behind us.

I attempt to change the subject by saying, "Uh, you really know your way around..." I look around the tidy room, pulling my hand away from hers and fidgeting with the ends of my sleeves. I avert my gaze from Chloe, but she steps into my point of view. She too is looking around the room.

"Yeah, I've had sex in pretty much every room in this house" she mentions casually, smiling to herself, then looking at me. Her eyes feel like they're staring through me.

"Uh.."

She huffs playfully "Because I dated Jake!". She turns and steps toward me, putting a hand on my chest and playing with the zipper on my sweater. She looks up at me, and I can hear her breathing, and her chest is against mine. It's almost suffocating. "God, what kind of slut do you think I am?" She trails off and looks at my zipper. My heart starts beating a mile a minute as she bites her lip and pulls my zipper down. My sweater is open, revealing my t-shirt. I resist the urge to cover myself, despite not being nude.

I push Chloe off of me as casually as I can. I really don't like where this is going. I change the subject once again, "So, um, where's Brooke?"

Her coy smile falters for a moment, before regaining it once more. "Oh my god," she chuckles, taking my face into her hands, "You are too freaking adorable", she condescends. I almost sigh in relief when she lets go and instead focuses on picking at her nails. "Brooke's not coming" she murmurs, giggling a bit.

"Sh-she's not...?" Inside, I honestly would give anything for Brooke (or anybody for that matter) to save me from this situation. "Then why--"

She puts her finger to my lip, grinning and showing her too-white teeth. "Do you wanna hang for a bit?" Without warning, she pushes my sweater off my arms and drops it to the floor. I feel cold.

I tense up and stare at her. Dread washes over me and I don't move. It's like her intimidating glare keeps me in place.

She puts her hand on my chest once again and begins very slowly walking me backwards. "Just you and me," Chloe's eyes scan me up and down, and I once again supress the need to turn away from her gaze. "Intimately..." 

I should be enjoying this, this is what I wanted, right? Why do I feel terrified? Why isnt my SQUIP saying anything? "...talking about our feelings and shit..." she shrugs playfully. 

We stop when I hit something, the bed, and she shoves me down onto it. I land, laying on my back with my arms holding me up, and look up at her. Her staring down at me like I'm some kind of meal makes me feel more vunerable and weak than I have in years. I look down and try to ignore how she's looking at me.

"Do you wanna get really deep?"

I don't respond. I feel like my head is trying to pretend she isn't there.

"We could could connect, and if I get wrecked..." She bends down so we're eye-to-eye. My heart feels like it's stopped, but I can feel my pulse. "You could rock this baby fast asweep". She smiles in what I think is supposed to be an innocent way, but just feels patronizing and fake. 

Just like her.

My addrenaline is rushing as I sit up quickly and she takes a step back in shock. "I-I have to go!" I exclaim, and try to stand up. But nothing will move. "I..." I look Chloe in her dark, judging eyes, "I can't stand up...".

Every excuse and escape strategy is crumbling apart. I feel my eyes well up and my breath quickens. Every emotion is overwhelming me at once, and one voice echoes in my head above all of this:

"Your welcome" my SQUIP says calmly.

Chloe rolls her eyes and it makes me want to curl up and die there. She raises one leg over mine, then another, then she's straddling me and I feel even more trapped. She places her arms around my neck and it feels like she's choking me. I breathe and try to compose myself. It's my fault for coming up here. I'm a guy, I should be happy with this right? I should want this right? I'm pathetic. Maybe the SQUIP is right. Maybe I should just lay back and enjoy this.

For some reason the idea makes me feel gross. Then, I feel bad for Brooke.

Chloe breathes a laugh. "I don't know why she's so crazy about you!" she claims, as if she read my mind, "you're not that cute, no offense". 

I grit my teeth and glare up at her. I might as well amuse her. "Ha, none taken--" I try to gently push her off of me. "I should really get back-"

She grips my shoulders tighter and god, I just wish somebody would make this all stop right now. "You know, she's not that innocent! That whole "wounded puppy" routine? It's how she gets all the guys". She glares at nothing and clenches her jaw. "Acts all helpless so they want to protect her- I mean," she stops her rant and sighs, "not that I care..."

A realization hits me. I glare accusingly at her. "You're jealous of Brooke!"

She grimaces and grips the collar of my shirt. "Um, obviously I am not..."

My mouth continues rambling, and I don't know if it's the SQUIP or my subconcious thoughts but I don't mean to say "But that's insane! Why would you be jealous of anybody, you're the hottest girl in school!"

What the fuck. No, I did not want to say that.

Chloe looks surprised. I stammer, "Did I just say th-" I'm stopped by Chloe grinning and pushing me roughly down onto the bed. "N-no, wait, I-"

I'm cut off by her mouth on mine. It feels filthy and I hate it. I try to push her off of me, as the tears come back and I begin to panick. Not here, not now, please God. I yell at the SQUIP, "Make it stop!"

I can practically hear the smug bastard's shit-eating grin. "I don't understand the request!".

She hears me and looks down, grinning maliciously. "Do you want to want to stop being coy?" She pulls my arms up roughly and almost rips my shirt pulling it off me. I feel so vunerable and exposed. I just want anything to stop her from doing this to me. I almost start crying when she starts unbuckling my belt. 

I feel like vomiting. It doesn't feel good like it's supposed to. It feels gross as she places her hand on my bare chest. It feels unnatural, like it's not supposed to be happening, when pulls at my belt buckle.

She leans in really close to my ear, and her hair itches and tickles my cheek. I hate it. "Do you wanna get inside my diaper boy?"

Fuck no. No, no, no please I don't want this.

I can't say that though. It's like I'm frozen. She reaches under her skirt and pulls out a shiny, metal flask. She flashes another one of her intimidating grins. 

"It's not actually milk".

Is she really gonna fucking do this? "I-i'm not really a big drink-" the flask is shoved to my lips. A burning, sharp liquid trickles down my throat and a couple tears fall as I try to swallow it. It's that or choke.

I hate this. I hate all of this. Is this what sex is? Just feeling too sweaty and people ignoring what you might be feeling? Just this basic primal instinct of getting what they want by any means? If that's the case I never want sex again. I just want to leave. 

It feels like this will never end.

Until an insistent knock comes from the bedroom door, and a concerned voice calls from the outside, "Jeremy?!"

Fuck.


End file.
